22 February 2006

Greetings, Greetings Fellow Stargazers!

Just as the tides ebb and flow with the waxing and waning of the moon, so too do my opportunitities to blog come and go with the waxing of school work and the waning of Wayne from the WonderYears(he will always be "butthead" to me). And now for the long awaited dance of joy spawned by the vanquishment of Squatter Chad. He infected my apartment, like a parasitic fungus, incubated his filth and squalor in my living room(he took living room way to literally) for over a month. While I struggled to launch my own personal Bay of Pigs, his communistic empire of decay spread. He had all of the benefits of Kato Kalin, without the negative media presure. He came hidden in a Trojan Horse of pity. "Oh, I just need to get back on my feet". I didn't buy it. I wouldn't take it if you gave it to me, but what choice did I have. Fortunatley my grass loving landdespot was keen enough to notice that Squatter Chad had been living in our livingroom for over month without so much as keeping his dirty socks of the floor, let alone pay rent, go to school, get a job. In fact all that SquatterChad seemed to be acomplishing was stealing my air. I am sure his mom is very proud. Much like any slacker's parents would be. I have achieved carthisis in his flight.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Though the experience was not, the literary description of the event was, shall we say, scrumtralescent.

Creativity Escapes Me said...

A squatter huh? Well see you later.

FPrince said...

I saw it. It's a true story. I'm a witness to the grandestitude of the sorrisosoness. Let us thanks the powers that be that he be vanquished.

Melanie said...

Isn't squatter a great word?

FPrince said...

Great indeed. His languor and general unpleasantness, yea, the black hole that was his presence, was not great.
Squatters on farmland rule, though. Yes!

T.R. said...

so.........does this mean you've got an opening for a new squatter? because $0/month is less than I am paying at the moment.